Ben Shephard

Today was the kids nativity play at school so me and Janine went up to see the kids. This was a whole new experience for me and made me a little uneasy but I was ok with it. I remember when I was at school everything seemed normal to me but having not sat on a school chair for 15 years or so I realised how much I’d grown myself because my fat ass needed two seats and I wasn’t very comfortable. I’ve never had much experience with kids. I don’t have any of my own and there aren’t even any in my family right now since the youngest is about 16. I was like a fish out of water but it was a good experience. At one point one of the other parents and a friend of Janine’s handed Janine her three month old baby to hold while she took a few pictures of her older son. Seeing Janine with a baby made me feel a little bit funny because it is something we have discussed together. We have both said that now is not the right time but that we might have one together one day if we ever decided to and I was thinking what life would be life if we did. It’s a scary thought but I think I’m a little more willing to face it now than I would have been five years or so ago.

I feel like I’m at a strange cross roads in life and as I sit writing this with Janine by my side I can’t wait to get on with things.

One of the first steps towards our future together is to try to give Janine a bit more freedom. Since she doesn’t drive I’m want to try and teach her and today I bought a set of L plates to go on the Honda and I’m going to try and add her as a named driver to my car insurance. Proper lessons will still be needed since I might be able to drive but I highly doubt most people who can drive could pass a test today. It’s gotten a lot harder in the ten years (almost to the day) since I passed mine and there have been lots of new things introduced like the hazard perception test and they can be pretty picky on the practical side anyway and I have developed a lot of bad habits over the years. This should prove an interesting experience as I’ve never taught anyone to drive before.

New experiences often feel a little bit strange and that’s usually enough to put me off and send me running back to the familiar surroundings of my lonely computer room but this time I feel like it’s worth hanging around. Kids are the thing that worries me most. I’ve never had to play an active role as a parent and there is a lot to learn. Kids are complex things. I find my mind works best when I’m working with electronics or technology. A computer is very predictable and kids just aren’t. sometimes it’s hard to know what to do and what to say to them but Janine is a good mum and I’m watching and learning all the time. I couldn’t be a teacher, I’ve got a lot of respect for anyone that works with kids because I just wouldn’t have a clue.

In short never work with children or animals. I will say that when they are good they can be the best thing in the world but when they are behaving like little brats I could tear my hair out if I had any left.

Ben

= 7.6